Singles Shopping for Singles

Online Dating is a plethora of possibility.  If you are fortunate to have never dipped a toe in the vast pool of online dating, allow me share some eye-opening statistics. 

At this very moment, when I enter a search on the largest dating site in the US, there are 998 eligible bachelors, between the ages of 55-65 within a 10 mile radius of my zip code. There are 1048 women strutting their stuff in the same age bracket.   

Let's see what happens when I change the age to 25-35...holy smokes!  1541 women and 2000+ men (who are a whole lot hotter than the old guys I'm shopping for). 

The sheer numbers are overwhelming.  Fortunately, it's easy to narrow the criteria based on factors such as height, body type, marital status, race, religion, politics, hair/eye color, horoscope sign, etc..   Let's see what happens if I narrow the field to men 55-65, 5'10" to 6'3", conservative with a few extra pounds:  a mere 27.   Change to conservative, athletic and toned, and it jumps to 131.  Apparently, most conservative, single men work out, or they lie about their body type.  The athletic liberals are a scarce 64 and the chunky liberals are rare indeed--7.    

This could be fun to play with--bald, overweight, smoker, divorced, who like to dance, or 6'3" separated, Sagittarius skier with slate blue eyes---the combinations are endless!  Anyway, you get the idea. 

My usual search brings up 330 average to athletic, slightly tall, non smokers within a 10 mile radius of home.  So far, I've met about 15 of them....yikes!  I need to narrow the field!

Bachelor Number One

My first dance in the dating cha cha is Mr. Writer.  He is an accomplished writer, contributing articles to business journals and travel magazines.  His profile paints a picture of looks, intelligence, education and possible tag-along business trips for yours truly.   We exchange emails and make plans. 

We meet at a local restaurant for a glass of wine--aka a "meet and greet".   Short and sweet.  A quick excape if it doesn't work out.  But, we hit it off and order dinner and another wine.  He's smart and interesting with lots of adventurous stories.  He's in pretty good shape.  And he likes me too.  When we part ways we have plans to meet again.  This is starting out really well.    

A few days later, we get together in the afternoon to take a walk in the park.  We are  absorbed in talking and sharing and holding hands.  I could see myself with this guy....down the road.  But, I hadn't really SEEN Mr. Writer.   I mean, I hadn't really LOOKED at him.  Then, in the blaring light of day, as he reaches for my hands across the table and we look into each other's eyes....I take a good look at him for the first time.  As we continue to converse, I become fascinated with his bushy mustache. It is a thing to behold.  It's all I can see of him.  

I wonder...where does his mustache end and his nose hair begin?

Needless to say, I didn't kiss him goodby....

Brave New World of Dating

I am venturing into the Internet dating world.  Taking a deep breath and diving into...... well...wading into the sea of singles.  

With all the bravery I can muster, I create my online profile. Upload my best photos, reveal my age, interests and background.  I carefully pen a summary of my dreams and desires.   With both excitement and trepidation, I hit Submit.  Ready or not, here I go....Dating Mr. Maybe.  

While awaiting profile approval, I eagerly begin a search of men in my age group (middle aged to old fart).  There are literally hundreds of eligible bachelors within a 10 mile radius of my zip code.   They come in all shapes and sizes; hairy, bald, bald with facial hair, (what are they hiding under that scruffy beard?) fat, skinny, muscular, big belly, tattoos, handsome, suave, cute, gross and scary.  Their photos show them in tuxedos at their daughter's wedding, sitting with their elderly mother, petting a dog on their lap, straddling a motorcycle, standing next to an expensive car or holding up a big dead fish.  I wonder how current some of these photos are.....

This is better than shoe shopping!  All these men to shop!  I am delighted to find a selection of handsome strangers smiling at me from my iPad screen.  They are not only handsome, their profiles describe them as adventurous, sensitive, romantic and rich!  Not one single dead fish photo anywhere in my potential suitor list. Perhaps I'll meet Mr. Right and get off this dating site quickly.  We will ride off into the sunset to a life of adventure and romance.  (Well, why not?  I still have a Cinderella fantasy, only Prince Charming has grey hair and might need a little pharmaceutical assistance.)   I get to work sending a few emails to the cream of the crop.

My profile is approved and published and immediately, the emails and winks begin to pop into my inbox.  The first day, I receive 9 emails, 11 likes and 7 winks.

The dating Cha Cha has begun.